Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Honesty... Not just a word in the dictionary

I have not always been an honest person. I have told my share of lies through my life. This is not to say that I am perfect now or that I have ever had periods where I was a total scum bag and lied about everything but I have told a few lies.

I don't think that at any point in my life that I set out to outright lie about something. Usually something would happen inadvertently and I would lie to save my own skin but I don't think I ever did anything and thought that I would do something and lie about it, it was never premeditated I guess is the phrase I'm looking for.

I don't know if it is a conscience that keeps me from doing this or the morals my mother brought me up with or just a desire to be an honest citizen. I don't think I won't ever lie again. There are just some questions that you can't help but lie to (usually referred to as white lies.) I try not to because I believe in being honest and it has gotten me into trouble a few times. I guess the reason is because I can be brutally honest.

As with most of my blogs, there is an event that sparks the fire that becomes the outpouring that becomes my ramblings. The one event opens the gateway to all the memories of events that are similar to or have something in common with the event that sparked the "gotta-get-it-off-my-chest" blog.

This incident involved a freight claim at work. We has a shipment of 8 packages come in that showed signs of damage or missing items. The person who was supposed to check the shipment did not at the time and when it was time for those items to go out, there was a scramble because 2 parts were missing.

Several people had stated that they did extensive searches for these items but to no avail. Therefore, logic states that we make a claim with the freight company for those missing items. Not more than 5 minutes of filing that claim did the missing items turn up. (So much for extensive search.) So, making sure that I cover all my bases, I asked a particular person (no mention of names) whether all was well with that particular order so I could cancel the claim.

Now, the correct response was that everything was fine. The response I got was something different. That particular order was fine but we had lost money one a couple of other shipping problems that we just corrected and didn't bother to make claim against so we should leave the claim to collect on all the other times where we should have but didn't file a claim.

This wasn't a hard decision for me and took very little time to recognize this as dishonest. If there were reasonable claims in the past and we just pushed through them and corrected the error without bothering to file claim paperwork, apparently it wasn't worth enough to worry about. This isn't about accumulation and finding one claim with which to "get even" for past events.

I started to think about all the other events in life where dishonesty reared its ugly head. I'm not talking about the little lie when someone asks about their hair or makeup but the big lies that can cause loss and problems. The one's where you have to keep up the lies. You make up stories to save your own skin or keep out of trouble or to get something in which you are not entitled.

Movies and books have been written about it. Aesop wrote fables about it. I think this fits into the category of the "Mean People Suck" blog. It is so sad because there is good in everyone. It is possible for people to be honest but they just find it "entertaining" to lie, cheat, and steal.

I find it troublesome that people would not take responsibility for themselves enough to be honest with their fellow man. I, myself, find it difficult to understand why people would want to continue to lie when the truth is so much easier. I guess for the same reason why people want to be hurtful towards others.

So many things could be avoided by just being honest. I can see that there are some benefits in the short run with lies but they are mostly superficial and, in the long run, you lose a lot more than you gain.

There are some "lies" I still perpetuate (just so that someone doesn't bring them up.) Certain childhood characters that benefit children in one way or another are something that I really do enjoy fulfilling the role of. I'm not sure if these are counted as lies or just a displacement of credit to a fictional character. You decide for yourself but I don't necessarily count these in the "lie" category.

1 comment:

Tracy said...

It's funny that you share this. We are trying to teach our kids the importance of honesty and last night, there was an incident of someone opening a bag of crackers. I asked the kids who did it and the older two are pretty good about not lying, but the 4 year old, she's still learning. So I looked at her and she blamed the baby, who I figured was a little to young to be able to open this bag of crackers. I questioned a little further and the truth came out. I told her that she needed permission for stuff like that and that she needs to ask. I didn't blow up at her I didn't send her to her room, I just let her know she needed to ask.